How To Stop Overthinking And Relax

stop overthinking and relax more

How To Stop Overthinking And Relax More

If you want to learn how to stop overthinking and how to relax. It helps to understand why we overthink and why it is so detrimental to our health and wellbeing. And why the ability to relax is so important.

Overthinking usually refers to the act of ruminating, focusing on something for too long or too many times. In many ways, rumination is a by-product of our over-busy modern lifestyle.  Especially obsessing over the negative or possible aspects of a situation, which is exhausting, unproductive and at times depressing

Studies have shown that over-thinking, ruminating is linked to anxiety and stressin both childhood and adulthood. The overthinking analytical mind is a strategy the ego uses to help us to feel in control or safe. It is a developed part of our innate survival response, the healthy analytical mind helps us find solutions from danger. But the unhealthy ruminative mind is in a constate state of anxiety and stress. And when people suffer from chronic anxiety and chronic stress, the mind and body stops being able to relax. 

How To Stop Overthinking

People who tend to worry a lot, tend to live their life in a state of fear are more likely to engage in overthinking and rumination. But the reality is most anxiety and stress is triggered by ruminating over what could go wrong. Or over what we believe will cause us pain or suffering. Because of that fear we feel the need to control as many outcomes as we can.

But when we try to control everything we are not in the flow, not living in a natural harmonious state of being. We are living in a state of resistance which actually is the source of most suffering and dis-ease. So the overthinker is not living in the moment, not trusting the moment.

I was a highly anxious overthinking child, the eldest of many siblings. Beinghighly empathic I worried a lot about the needs of others. And that impacted my mental, emotional and physical wellbeing from a young age. It took me many years to learn how to stop overthinking and how to just be.

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How To Help Clients And Students Have Less Ruminative Thoughts

I spent 30 years studying many different mind, body, emotional and spiritual techniques. Yet despite studying different types of therapies, healing, mind techniques, psychotherapy.  I found for myself and clients the most simple approaches were often the most effective if approached in the right order, the right way.

We all deserve to live a more calm, content and stress-less life. And I have found the most effective way IS NOT trying to change all your thoughts. There is a theory we have 40, 000 negative thoughts each day . So that is a lot of thoughts you would need to change.  If we approach it from one step beyond our mindset. It is far more effective when we teach others how to reduce their attachment to our thoughts.  Reduce the engagement in overthinking and help them learn how to relax and be.

STOP Overthinking - How To STOP Overthinking and Learn To Relax

4 Ways To Reduce Overthinking

  1. Embrace The Here And Now – The easiest way to reduce overthinking is to embrace the present moment. Stop throughout your day and notice where your thoughts and where is your attention is? Is your attention on the activity that you are doing?  Is your attention fully with the people you are engaging with? Or is it in thoughts of the past, thoughts of what you have to do later in the day? We have lost appreciation and value for this moment. It is too easy to miss all the blessings that we are being given in this present moment.  And when the mind, the body, emotions, and spirit and not in the moment, disjointed and out of balance. We manifest dis-harmony, dis-ease.
  2. Learn How To Meditate – Meditation tools, when taught the right way, can be powerful ways to bring you into the present moment. Here in the west we are so conditioned into spending so many hours of our day doing, thinking and analysing. That most people really struggle to stop, struggle to relax especially relax properly. Now meditation helps because it encourages more space, more freedom between our thoughts. Meditation helps us connect with our own inner peace, our own inner calm, and our own inner guidance. It helps us reconnect with the self and less distracted by thoughts that are not facts. Less pulled in by the external distortion and manipulation of the world and media around us. 
  3. Develop Self-Compassion – We can all be too hard, demanding and uncompassionate towards ourselves. Especially about decisions, we have made in the past or even in our present situation. Because we are so over-identificated with who we think we are or are supposed to be. This leaves us more empty and confused, and more likely to fall into jobs and roles that do not fill our souls. Self-compassion can teach us how to giving ourselves the same compassion and understanding we give to those around us.
  4. Know You Are Enough – When you know you are more than enough, it’s easier to disengage with those self-sabotaging thoughts. Our biggest self-destruction is our beliefs around who we think we need or should be. We live in a distorted society that has convinced us, that our value lies in what we do, what we earn, what we look like. The roles, status, and power we have or take on, but none of this makes us more worthy or more valued. This is a huge distortion and so far from the truth. We are all born into this world enough, all with individual unique traits, gifts, skills, abilities and what may be perceived as disabilities. But none of them define our worth. 

4 Ways How To Learn How To Relax

  1. Take Time To STOP   So many people go through their day without stopping and taking a moment to stop, relax or rest. Tea breaks, lunch and afternoon breaks at work are not just about having a meal or a drink. But are there to remove yourself from your busyness and stress. When we work through our breaks and only try and switch off and relax just before going to bed or going on holiday. The mind and body can really struggle to relax, because it is overstimulated, over-stressed.  The mind and body needs periods of calm to restore balance. So breaks throughout your day, breaks at work, breaks at home, at school and college are important. If we skip time out, our mind and body forgets how to relax. It becomes more conditioned to be in the stress response instead of the relaxed response.
  2. Become Aware Of Your Physical Body – It is important to be aware and listen to your body, become aware of the tension in your body. When we are so in our mind, in our thoughts we are detached from our body, our emotions. It is important to be fully present with that tension without adding a story a reason why you are so tense. When we give our body that presence and attention it naturally starts to let go. You can learn how to listen and nurture your body with this soothing guided meditation.  It is important to know when your body needs rest, relaxation, the right food, water…
  3. Learn How To Relax And Sleep Deeply And Effectively- The inability to relax is one of the biggest causes of physical disease, sleep problems chronic pain and tension.  We are so mentally busy, so engaged in our thoughts we find it difficult to switch off or relax without any distractions, Many people think relaxation is sitting in front of the television, or playing a game on their computer or smartphone. But these activities are not relaxing, they are distractions of the mind. That is why Relaxation Therapy is a powerful way to teach clients and students how to let go of long-term anxiety, chronic stress, and stress-related insomnia. Relaxation techniques re-teach the body how to not only relax and just be, but help reduce pain and tension. 

 

 

Moving Into A State Of Being, Relaxing

As you can see how to stop overthinking and relax is very much about dis-engaging with unhealthy conditioning. It is about re-learning how to be, how to relax. A baby knows how to relax, knows how to be, knows how to appreciate the present moment. A baby usually comes into the world appreciated knowing it is enough. Until that baby starts to become conditioned towards fear, pain, expectations, guilt, shame, other people’s ideas of what is right, wrong. A society’s idea of what is right, wrong, good, bad, expected and not expected. The more you learn how to be in the moment and detach from your conditioning and learn how to relax, relax deeply and effectively. Overthinking starts to dissolve, there is less overthinking, less anxiety, less stress and less depression.

 

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Chronic Anxiety Triggers That Cause Anxiety Disorders

anxiety triggers chronic anxiety disorders

Chronic Anxiety Triggers That Commonly Cause Anxiety Disorders

Chronic Anxiety Triggers that are common causes of chronic anxiety disorders. Anxiety triggers that you need to address today to stop falling into the chronic anxiety cycle.

Chronic Anxiety is sadly an increasing problem. According to the Association Of Anxiety And Depress in the USA 18.1% of the american population suffer from anxiety disorders but only just over  1/3 of those suffers actually get treatment. According to the NHS 5% of the UK population suffer Generalised Anxiety Disorders ( GAD). 8.2 million cases of anxiety in the UK  in 2013.

Chronic Anxiety is a big problem and something I saw greatly in my one to one clients over the last 20 years. So many who came to me for help with stress were actually suffering from disabling symptoms of chronic anxiety. 

So What Is Anxiety?

Anxiety itself is something everyone experiences in their life it is the worry, the concerns, the fear and tension. Anxiety is generally viewed as a common and normal response to specific life situations. Until it becomes chronic anxiety, an anxiety disorder, a mental health disorder. Anxiety like stress is generally directly connected to our perception of a situation.

Anxiety And Stress Hormones

If you perceive something as frightening or uncomfortable, your body produces a level of stress hormones to match.  A little bit of fear releases enough adrenaline and cortisol to cause low-level symptoms of anxiety. But a situation perceived as extremely frightening will create enough stress hormones to produce the fight, flight or freeze response. That is why teaching anxiety sufferers, stress management, and relaxation techniques is so important and helpful. Relaxation Therapy is highly effective at reducing chronic anxiety problems, a visit to a Relaxation therapist can be very helpful.

But there are other biological factors that can make someone more vulnerable to anxiety and stress. Hyperthyroidism and other thyroid issues can increase anxiety and stress levels. Optimal wellbeing relies on a balance of the body’s hormones. Oxytocin is another horm one that can play havoc with the body in relation to anxiety and stress. Oxytocin although known as the love and bonding hormone is also the hormone that causes you to remember those traumatic experiences. So can play a part in PTSD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorders.Magnesium deficiencies can be a contributing factor to some mental health issues

An anxiety disorder is when anxiety overtakes your ability to function healthily and happily in your everyday life. When you suffer an anxiety disorder everyday situations become filled with feelings of fear and threat. You think and react as if you are in physical danger, you become more stressed. Anxiety disorders happen when chronic anxiety has not been addressed when daily anxiety triggers or trauma has not been healed or managed.

 

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What Triggers Chronic Anxiety Disorders

7 Common Anxiety Triggers That You Need To Address

Worry About Being Late: Do you get anxious about being late for work? Anxiety triggers about being late for that meeting or about getting the kids on time for school? Do you constantly rush about with a sense of urgency and drama? Worrying about being late is an everyday anxiety trigger that many people suffer from. Now for most people, the main cause of being late is poor organisation or time management issues.  But for other people, no matter how early they leave home for work or that appointment they will spend most of the time ruminating over all sorts of possible scenarios in their mind. The what if’s if they are late, what if I get fired, what if I can’t get a new job, what will my partner say, what will… When we are not fully in the present moment, we give our power away to the monkey mind, the ruminating.  If you do tend to run a bit little, leave things till last-minute. It’s time to get more organised, save yourself the stress and anxiety. It simply isn’t worth it.

Fear Of Conflict: A common anxiety trigger for many people especially empaths, highly sensitive people and those with self-esteem issues is fear of conflict. Not addressing relationship issues at home and work can cause not just of anxiety, but increased levels and depression.  Avoiding the problem, hiding your head in the sand can often lead to other problems. Some issues if not dealt with will lead to further causes of anxiety. Working on self-worth, self-esteem and assertiveness skill can encourage healthier communication. But again when learn to be more in the moment, the thoughts that normally trigger our fear, tension or stress start to disappear.

Health Concerns: For many people health concerns about their own health or a loved one is a major cause of serious anxiety. Those with chronic anxiety disorders will often constantly worry about everyone’s’ health and wellbeing. They will often make a fuss or get irrational over the smallest symptom. Parents particularly have to be aware that their children will often pick up on their anxiety. So it is important to address and treat any anxiety issues that you have. A child who lives around a lot fear will become fearful, will become disempowered. If your health concerns are related to a previous experience or trauma. It is important to address the issue. I have found Bach Flower Essences extremely supportive in helping clients with various chronic anxiety issues. Rescue Remedy is a useful all-rounder for many things. It is useful for everyday anxiety and general anxiety disorders.

Social Situations:  Socialising, all sorts of celebrations or events can trigger a great deal of anxiety for a lot of people. So many people associate certain times of the year or specific types of situations with painful or traumatising experiences. The thought of these situations can bring all sorts of anxieties up to the surface. The flower essence Start of Bethlehem which is also in Rescue Remedy. Is an extremely helpful flower essence that can help us let go of old trauma we are holding onto in our cellular body. particularly those traumas that still have a charge, that still causes a fight or flight reaction. Again it is our thoughts, the stories we tell ourselves about the situation that can be the biggest problem. In these situations, no 2 can be the biggest worry for many people. If you are highly Empathic or a HSP you mind find many social situations extremely exhausting, overwhelming, too noisy. So a practical tip is to have a backup plan to go home early or to bring an ally for extra support. But remember anxiety is not triggered by the situation but what you believe about the situation

Public Speaking: Most people hate public speaking, they hate having to do that talk or presentation. So when that job comes up at work, they will not only worry about for weeks. But will often do anything to sabotage or avoid the task in hand, which can lead to more problems. Again, if you are not organised or prepared, you are leaving room for more anxiety and pressure. And once again it’s all about your thoughts about the public speaking, the what if’s is causing your anxiety, not the actual situation.

Money Worries: Although most of us are living a more financially comfortable life than any of our ancestors ever did. A big source of anxiety for a lot of people is money and financial security. Again ruminating over the what if’s or over past situations when you financially struggled.  Will keep you in a state of anxiety. If you have serious financial worries, getting the right advice from a financial advisor can help. They will often give you expert advice, to take more positive actions towards reducing the pressure you are under. 

Consuming Stimulants: What are you consuming daily that is triggering or exacerbating anxiety? Caffeine, sugar,  artificial sweeteners such as aspartame, nicotine are all stimulants that can trigger anxiety. Overuse of stimulants triggers the fight or flight response, which increases the likelihood of cortisol dysfunction.  Daily consumption of stimulants can cause sugar imbalances, inflammation and a variety of other health issues. Reducing your caffeine or stimulant intake can help reduce your anxiety levels, can help curb the anxiety cycle.

The biggest challenge that Chronic Anxiety Sufferers have is STOPPING the chronic anxiety cycle of rumination, fear and trauma. This can be easily achieved when we treat anxiety with a holistic approach. Supporting the client towards a more balanced state of mind, body, and emotions.

Chronic Anxiety can be healed, chronic anxiety disorders are not something you just need to live with. If you suffer from GAD Generalised Anxiety Disorder, panic attacks, or any form of chronic anxiety issues. Get professional help. In my role as Stress therapist, Counsellor, and Coach I saw clients who had suffered for decades before seeking help, The longer people leave anxiety issues untreated or addressed the bigger hold it often it has over the life and sometimes can take longer to treat. But it can be treated, it can be eliminated with the right approach

When you understand your anxiety, understand your symptoms. It takes the fear out of the symptoms and helps the client become more aware of the thought patterns, the conditioning, and fears that need to be addressed. With the right stress and anxiety management tools, you become empowered, you stop suffering and start to feel free.

Eileen Burns, owner of Stress Coach Training, she is a highly qualified Stress Management Expert, therapist and Coach who has been studying holistic wellbeing and various forms of therapy for the last 28 years.

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